The vicious cycle of my mental illness

If you are one of the countless people cursed with mental illness, then please share your thoughts if this pertains to you.

I have been battling with extreme depression and anxiety for years. We (the sufferers) only have so much control of our own involving our thoughts, feelings, and actions,
but I feel we are limited.

Someone recently told me that I could have taken care of this vicious cycle by natural herbs and remedies. I cannot afford to find out if this is true and I have been on my roller coaster of the depression train over her input.

Those are my thoughts today. I'm not on here that often as I am dealing with med changes, and recent comments of people who are not sufferers. As one person told me, I am this way because there is no joy in my life.

If only they knew how much joy I do have... 

Update: This was an old entry I transferred from my dead blog. I am thankful to report that I did  not give up on searching for the proper medication to help me cope with my mood disorder. My depression and anxiety levels are finally manageable and I like the person I am today.